Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Got Gusto?

I get distracted easily. Not too easily, but a river would be a metaphor that fits my thought process better than a train. While engaging with fiction (the consumption of it, not the production) I'm completely taken, and my focus is devoted in whole. I wish I could transfer that devotion of attention to other areas of my life, like, for instance, while writing.

That's an interesting thing to think about. If I had the time and ability, what would I dedicate myself to? Like, really dedicate myself. What would you? Lets say you have the capacity to give something (or someone) complete focus. What (who) do you choose?

I'd like to propose several things, but that sentiment is precisely what keeps me from the sort of dedication I'm talking about. There are too many things I'm interested in, and too many things that I feel like I'm compelled to do. 

Eating and sleeping are pretty basic things that I can't (or at least shouldn't) go without. Writing is the thing I would end up choosing to concentrate on, in all seriousness. Another thing that comes to mind is the culture of video games, but I don't like them as much as I've convinced myself I like them. I enjoy talking about them and reading about them more than I enjoy playing them, I think. Creating games (card games/board games/theory building video games) is usually more fun than playing ones that already exist. Games are great, don't get me wrong, but I think it's my friends that make the games enjoyable, not necessarily the games themselves (though it sure does help when we have a well designed game).

Friends (and family) are a nice thing, because they don't require the same kind of dedication other things do. Sometimes you can do the things you're dedicated to with them. For instance, my new roommate, Hans, is pretty big into being fit. He's a well built guy, and exercise is a pretty big part of his life. He's also pretty fun to talk with and be around, so I've started to work out with him, mostly because spending time with him is enjoyable, to be honest. Working out hurts, and I can't say it's something I'd do on my own.

Conversing, when I can wrangle a poor soul or two into some interesting topic, is another thing that envelopes me a lot like books or shows. Exploring abstract (and concrete) concepts with others through language is one of the most enjoyable aspects of life. Talking about games, writing, fiction, life, exploration into the self and into the other, morality, reality, actions, inaction, unknowns, and knows alike are all conversational playgrounds which I wish I could never leave.

After thinking these thoughts I realize that I need to write more (and more, and more). There are real things that are keeping me from it, like a job, like friends, like family, and life in general, but there's no real excuse. If I want to write as bad as I do (and I do), I need to develop an ardor unrivaled.

So do you, for whatever it is you want to be the focus of your life.